Blog Carnival

 

Welcome to the April, 2008 Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse

 

This is my first time hosting the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse, and I'd like to start out by giving a big "thanks" to Marj aka Thriver for all of her kind (and patient) help. 

Before clicking on the links below, let me slip in a much needed disclaimer:

All of the writings listed below have the potential to trigger. Please use caution when reading these posts if you are an abuse survivor.

Though there is no set theme for this month's carnival, I've listed the entries in categories for easier browsing.

Advocacy and Awareness 

In  Reclaiming Your Voice, posted at Menstrual Poetry, Holly writes about a unique project, the Teddy Tours, designed to give child abuse survivors a voice.  

 
Nancy at Heal and Forgive submitted a post about The National Association to Protect Children. She writes, "In honor of Child Abuse Prevention & Sexual Assault Awareness Month, I thought I would submit this January post. Thanks!"

How are girls conditioned from an early age to have no boundaries? Read this intriguing post, Socialization Which Sets Up Sex Predators/Passive Victim Model, contributed by Marcella Chester from Abyss 2 Hope: A Rape Survivor's Zigzag Journey Into the Open. 

From Austin at Sundrip Journals comes a provocative post, Female Sadists--Therapy Discussion 1 0f 2. Why do we not hear more about female predators? Is it because society doesn't want to believe than women (let alone mothers) could be capable of acts of physical and sexual violence? This thoughtful piece explores such disturbing questions with Austin's  customary intelligent candor. She comments on this post:

"To separate female offenders from male offenders is to give them a license to offend. Viewing female offenders differently than male offenders leaves their victims in a different light as well. We must see offenders for who they are and not separate accountability according to gender. Only in this way do we leave no survivor behind."

The Prudent Babbler poses the question Protecting Children: Is America In a Losing Battle?  She writes: "America has been losing the battle to keep our children innocent. There are some bright spots: Bill O’Reilly has done a great job getting Jessica’s Law passed. But we have a long way to go; our nation must stand up for our children’s innocence."

 
Information and Support for People with DID/MPD and Their Families from John, of Keepers Korner, explores the unique challenges of  a singleton living with a significant other with multiplicity.

JIP from Life Spacings asks the question, Love Means Exactly . . .  What?

"Words can hurt and it is important to recognize when verbal abuse occurs," writes The Eclectic Female. Her post is entitled, Recognizing Verbal Abuse in Relationships---a must read for anyone struggling with this particular form of relationship abuse.

Holly from Menstrual Poetry presents Finding Angela Shelton, a post in which the making of a survivor's documentary about her sexually abusive father is portrayed. 

Aftermath

Marcella, from Abyss 2 Hope: A Rape Survivor's Zigzag Journey Into the Open, examines the many-faceted issues of rape (for example, is it really rape if no weapon is used?) in her compelling post, Advice for Rape Survivors' Personal Safety.

Kim at Perfect begins her  Dear Father submission to the Blog Carnival with the words, "As far as I'm concerned, this will be my final letter to you. In a recent exercise, I constructed the father of my dreams and I said goodbye to him. I believe that holding onto the desire for that father to someday be part of my life is what has kept me attempting to reach out to you." Writing letters to our abusers (whether or not we ever send them!) is an excellent healing exercise.

In my own post, Ain't No Way to Describe It, here at Beautiful Dreamer, I attempted to put into words that which can never be truly articulated:  the shame and horror of sexual abuse. 

Healing and Therapy

Trying Other Options to Survive Our Bad Days "is one way of reclaiming what has been taken away so the pain is nowhere near so bad," writes Keepers of Keepers Korner in a post which explores creative ways to deal with the painful anniversaries with which all survivors are faced.

Enola, in her blog of the same name, examines the benefits and necessity of struggles in our journey toward wholeness by sharing the story of a man who tried to help a butterfly, in her post A Benefit of Struggling.

What are the downfalls and/or benefits from allowing oneself to be vulnerable? This is the topic explored in Kim's post, The V Word, Part One, at her blog entitled, Perfect. This post gives much food for thought; as survivors trust is such a huge issue, and being vulnerable is not something we do well.

Rebirthing Ourselves is an excellent post written by April Optimist at Thriver's Toolbox. We would all do well to follow her lead in questioning the assumptions we hold about ourselves based on what we were taught to believe as children.  You can read Part 2 of this post here. April writes, "This with the other post are part of my journey of rediscovering who I can be, and letting go of the conditioning of my childhood."

Mike Mc Bride speaks about the very real hope of life and healing after abuse, in his post Speaking Out at Child Abuse Survivors.

Rising Rainbow from My Clouds, My Storms and MPD, asks the question: Ok, I'm Out of the Closet With Multiple Personality Disorder Thing, Now What?

She explains, "Multiples can be just like other people. We aren't all like Sybil or Eve. Integration doesn't have to be the end result of therapy. Instead therapy can be a way to undo the old programming that goes with victimization and put one on the path the really living life for ourselves."

Poetry 

Angela at Here and Now 4 Angel wrote a poignant poem honoring her younger abused  self, Little Girl Lost. 

"I can see you're not your pain," is a line from the lovely poem  Love's Light, contributed by Marj at Survivors Can Thrive. This deceptively simple poem carries quite an impact as its message of pain and hope touches a chord deep within those who carry within them the sour weight of shame. Marj explains, "I believe that all children come from the divine source of light and love. My parents tried to kill that light and love in me. This poem talks about the recovery journey I'm on--a journey of reaching in and healing that part of me so that I can let my light shine and let my love go back out into the universe once again."

I'm including my own poem, The Color of Bones, for those who haven't yet stumbled across it. In this poem I portrayed not only the shame of being the victim, the unloved redheaded-stepchild, but tried to convey as well how adept my mother was at bleaching from my life all hope and safety.

In the News 

Danica, at Facing Abuse, shares with us her post entitled The False Memory Syndrome Foundation: Mock 'Em If You Got 'Em?

The controversial subject of false memories has been much in the news of late. Danica says, "It's awfully hard to pick just one (post) because my whole blog's theme is abuse, addiction, and recovery... I guess I'd better volunteer to host a carnival, huh? :) I am choosing to share my article about the False Memory Syndrome Foundation because even though it doesn't fit into any one category perfectly, it is definitely about how abuse shows up in the news, how it is treated by the media and by abusers, and about the backlash that many survivors have had to deal with. And I think it's hilarious - the blog post, I mean, not the backlash itself."

Archvillain at A Dark and Sinister Force for Good pulls no punches in his post entitled, Whiskey Tango Foxtrot (part 2). This blog tells it like it is regarding the matter of course way in which children are systematically abused, often with no or little consequences to the perpetrators.

Jack from Atheist Revolution examines the case of an 11 year old girl who died unnecessarily due to her parents' refusal to seek medical aid which might have saved her life, in his post Christian Extremism Kills. 

Survivors Stories

And finally, to wrap up this month's Blog Carnival, here's a short film by Holly Ord (of Menstrual Poetry) called, No Trespassing.

This concludes this edition of the Blog Carnival Against Child Abuse. Many thanks to all who took the time to send us their submissions. We all know what courage it takes to speak out against child abuse; please visit the survivors and advocates of this carnival, and let them know how much you appreciate their efforts to take a stand against abuse. 

 

 

Comments

[marj aka thriver]

What a fantastic carnival edition...and BIG! Whoa! Thanks for wrestling this biggy and coming up with such a great one! I'm going over to look at the participant posts. GOOD JOB! :)

[Nancy]

Thank you for hosting an incredible edition of the Blog Carnival Against Abuse! Lots of good stuff here!

[Mike McBride]

As usual it seems like there a whole lot of good stuff to read here. Thanks for putting it all together!

[abyss2hope]

Thanks for putting together such a comprehensive carnival and for including me in such fine company.

[Holly]

Great roundup of posts, lots of great reading and of course, thanks a lot for including my posts.

[Holly Desimone]

Great job done on the Carnival...

[Wendy]

Hey, I just found this browsing through Brian the HummingBunny's blog. I'm an abuse survivor (and a journalist), and live in Jordan leading small groups in recovery. And continuing my journey in it as well. :)

I really don't know what a blog Carnival is, but on my blog is an article I wrote for a women's lifestyle magazine what was the very first piece in print giving Arab victims a voice. Here, there is still a chance they will be killed for speaking of their abuse, for it is always the victims fault and only their death can recover lost family honor.

[Patricia - Spiritual Journey Of A Lightworker]

Hi. I haven't posted an article with this carnival in awhile. Is it still active?